Sunrise: Eclipse with BJ
by Gaunt Riverman
Summary: Edward left Bella after she stopped him from committing suicide and she is reduced to an even worse state. Jacob comforts her by trying ot recreate all her painful memories and replacing htem wiht happy ones involving him
1. Chapter 1 Holes

Sunrise

**This is assuming that Edward never returns after Bella saves him and Bella, ridden with pain at the memories that returned to her, turns to Jake for comfort.**

**Ch.1 Holes**

Jake has been way nicer to me than I deserve. He has stayed with me through all of it, all the terrorized screaming, all the tears, all the pain. He would sit in the garage calming me for hours while I screamed my heart out. My madness scared Charlie so much I ended up spending a lot of time at La Push.

It was so much easier when I hadn't seen him. When I first saw him for the first time in months, standing in the alley in Italy, my hole had disappeared. Then, when he left again, the hole did not come back. Instead I could feel part of myself tearing away, pulling towards him. What I got was half a Bella.

It wasn't missing him that was the problem; I had perfected that during my long months of suffering. It was the flashbacks. It was the out of body experiences where I would be watching him play the piano that day, lying with him in the meadow, standing with him in Italy. I cried not because I missed him, but because I would never again experience that. The bleak knowledge of that was enough to pour salt on the half-Bella I had left.

Most days Jake would come in, like Edward, through my window and sit with me. Seeing him come in would bring me to tears again, but it was also happier with him there. Not enough to ease my pain completely, but enough to make it seem a little healthier.

Tonight was one of those days, and I was screaming silently in Jake's arms, not entirely there. Not a complete Bella.

"I hate him, Bells." Jake said suddenly. I looked up at him. He didn't usually talk at night, just hold me and let me cry.

"W-What, Jake?" I asked. He gritted his teeth.

"I hate him for making you scream at night. For turning me into the only doctor you will see. For making you _hurt_!" he said the last word with such acid it was as if he was talking about people committing murder. While it was true I refused to see a doctor, I was slightly taken aback that Jake considered himself my doctor.

"It's not that he makes me hurt, it's just like he left holes." I tried to explain. "Parts of me that j-just can't function without him. H-holes in my memories, too. Like… I can't think about certain stuff without thinking of h-h-him." I shuddered and Jake gripped me to keep me from collapsing.

"Like what?" he probed. I attempted to glare at him but all I could manage was a grimace.

"Meadows, p-pianos, b-biology, R-Romeo and J-J-Juliet, static c-charges, the list goes on and on!" I sobbed and coughed. Jake frowned.

"Then…" he pondered something for a minute. "What if I gave you happy memories? Memories that would erase the bad. Would that make it easier for you?" I paused. I was surprised he would suggest it, but it seemed, oddly, like a good idea.

"Maybe, Jake… I don't really know… it might just bring me more pain." Jake grimaced at that thought.

"It's worth a decent try, Bells. Anything's better than having you sob on the floor every time you hear his name."

I nodded. He hugged me tighter and we sat together in silence.

"Jake?" I asked. He looked at me. "You can check on off the list." He looked at me, confused. "Edw- he used to climb into my window and talk to me. That was one of the memories." Jake frowned.

"So… you can check it off now, than?" I nodded. Then he smiled a big, wolfish smile and I fell back on the bed. I didn't dream about Edward that night.


	2. Chapter 2 Wolf

**Ch.2 Song of the Wolf**

I awoke to the sound of rain. Jake had left a small note of farewell by my bed. I picked it up and read it, my suspicion growing.

Bells,

Went to get something. Sorry I left. Meet me in La Push Sam and Emily's house. They're out on vaca, I have a key. C U there!

Jake

I wondered briefly why he wanted me at Sam and Emily's, before I realized I didn't really care. I dressed and headed downstairs. Charlie was eating breakfast.

"Hey, kid!" he said, the normal enthusiasm in his voice. "What are you planning on doing today?" I looked at him and shrugged, then walked out the door. As always, he made no move to stop me.

I started my car and drove in the general direction of La Push. Meanwhile I was running ideas through my head. Trying to debate whether Jake's theory would work or not without thinking about my own horrible memories. Finally I pulled up at La Push and tried my best to just think positive.

Jake was waiting outside Sam and Emily's house. The door was slightly ajar. I debated whether to ask Jake whether he was supposed to be here or not, but than decided against it. No need to unnecessarily worry myself.

Jake smiled and led me through the house into the main room. My knees buckled hen I saw the centerpiece. It was a large, ivory piano. Jake was on me in an instant.

"Bella!" he said. "Are you ok?' I nodded.

"I'm so sorry… nostalgia." I said in explanation. Jake heaved me onto the couch and than resumed his smug smiling.

"Quil helped with this last night… I can't play it as well as he can… I have it on tape." He looked at me. I was a little confused.

"Do you want the tape version or do I have to play it?" he asked.

"Uh… you can play it." I said. I was still not totally following. Then he sat at the piano and I understood. I immediately got up to watch him play. He took a deep breath and started the song.

He was right; he wasn't the best at playing the piano. Yet it didn't matter to me, I couldn't even hear the choppiness in the notes, only the sweetness. Then, suddenly, I was no longer in the room.

I was riding motorcycles with Jake, wind in my hair, lying on the beach, having just been saved from certain death. Sitting with him as a wolf for the first time, realizing he was just as equal a person as I was. Working with him in the garage, laughing and talking. I was everywhere happy I had ever been with him, standing there listening to his song.

"What's it called?" I asked. Jake smiled softly.

"Friends." he said. I felt warmth flowing through me.

Jake stopped playing and went to a CD player, pressing play. The song came, this time more complex, accompanied by other instruments.

"May I have this dance?" Jake said, a grin spreading across his face. I had to give it to him, he was bold.

"Yes." I said, barely any emotion showing in my face. He held me tenderly, as tender as was possible for him. We spun in short circles around the deserted room, the music playing in the background.

"Quil wrote this?" I asked.

"Uh… no, actually I did." Jake said shyly. I looked at him with new eyes.

"Really!" I said. He smiled.

"I'm not completely devoid of emotion, you know." he said. I snorted.

"I'm _so_ sure." He laughed.

"So Quil can play the piano." I said. "Huh… that just doesn't sound like him." Jake grinned.

"He did it to get girls," Jake said. I pulled a face.

"Who is playing the other instruments?" I asked.

"Computer generated." said Jake. I smiled.

"I don't know if this will work." I said. "What if it makes my Ed- him memories worse?" Jake frowned and pushed me away for a second.

"Bella, look me in the eyes and tell me it won't work." I looked up into Jakes brown, questioning eyes. In them was a well of emotions I didn't think Jake had. Happiness. Hurt. Anger. Love. Hope.

"I can't." I said.

"Of course you can't, Bells." he said, happiness glinting in his eyes as we resumed our spiral. "Of course you can't."


	3. Chapter 3 Dream Wolf

**Ch.3 The Dream Wolf**

_I was in the forest, sitting on the top branch of a massive tree, I remembered it faintly from my many jaunts in the forest, taken with and without Jake. It was right behind my house. I was sitting on the limb, watching a wolf run around playfully below me. _

_It was not Jake, it was too scarred and had a limp. However, it still had some grace to it. It was more beautiful than any wolves I had every seen in the Quileute pack. I felt sorry for the wolf and yelled down to it._

"_Why are you hurt? Who are you?" I yelled down. The wolf looked up and howled and I felt my heart stop. Staring into the eyes of the wolf, I knew that the battle scarred, graceful wolf below me was none other than Jacob Black._

I awoke screaming Jake's name. I hope Charlie didn't notice and come in, he would assume Jake had hurt me. Unfortunately, Charlie was bound to make assumptions like that. I shook my head and it cleared a little. It was hard to believe it was only a dream.

I couldn't convince myself Jake was fine. It was hard. Jake was out with the pack tonight, so he wasn't protecting me here. I felt almost guilty that he thought he would need to protect me over going with his pack, so I all but forced him to go with the pack tonight.

I looked at the clock and realized it was five. I got out of bed. Charlie wouldn't mind if I went for a walk just before sunrise, would he? I grabbed my coat and ran outside, barefoot and in my pajamas.

The night air was cool, and I couldn't help reprimanding myself for not bringing shoes. Nevertheless, I could feel an ever-driving force pushing me to go to the tree in my dream. I ran toward the forest.

I screeched to a halt in front of the tree. The first branch was a little high up, so I had to jump to get on it. Just climbing onto the one branch was exhausting, and I was just thankful that the limbs were all about the width of a door. I heaved myself onto the next one and continued in my twisted manner until I reached the top.

Standing on the top branch, gripping the trunk, I felt more a peace, even more than with Jake. Even though it was hard to see in the pale light of the moon, I still felt at ease. I looked down and thought briefly how dangerous it was to be this high in the air, but the combination of height, sleep deprivation and fear generated such an exhilarating high I honestly didn't care.

I felt something odd in my jacket pocket and pulled it out. As far as I could make out, it was the note from Jake and the pen he had used to write his note. I pulled it out. Suddenly I knew why I had come here. I sat down and started to sketch the wolf from my dream. It was not hard to do it in the darkness; I was sketching only from memory. I could have done it with my eyes closed.

When I was done I tried to make out my sketch. Then, as if on cue, the sun rose slowly, and I watched as I gradually made out my sketch. I gasped. It was a perfect likeness of the wolf. Captured in my little amateur sketch were its deep eyes, its scarred fur, even the grace in it. And all this is coming from a girl who couldn't draw a banana for her mom's anniversary card.

I watched the sunlight catch the pencil markings and make then light up; causing it to look like the wolf was a little sun. I watched the rays of light for a few seconds before remembering Charlie would be worried.

Still I couldn't help but to think of the sketch I slipped into my pocket. The littlest sun in the universe.


	4. ALL NOTICES HERE REGULARLY UPDATES

**Hey, It's Gaunt**

** Hiya! Sorry, I know I haven't been leaving comments or anything, because to be honest I was worried no one would like my story. BUt with a lot of peopler being kind and subscribing I figure i can pull out me shell. I am, as you can probably tell, a complete team Jacob, OK! It's rated T because there is going to be some insane violence later on. Oh, and please review. I need suggestions. Also, none of this whole post the words team edward on team jacob like stories. It really immature, guys.**

**You may notice a rapid add of chapters. I really hope that I write faster than you can read. But I want to help aspiring writers by giving up my writing secret. Listen to piano while you write. Find music that sets the mood. I use youtube for it. Make playlists for happy, sad, romance....**

**_Big thanks to (she had some great stories check them out), asfridr (awesome prof), jacobfan101(go Jake!), Seth'sGirl23 (romantic involvement with werewolf?)! You guys are the best for supporting this story! In my opinion this is the real story as it should have played out._**

**_I AM SO SORRY I GOT SICK AND THEN A REPORT FROM SOME WIERD PERSON SO I OULDN'T UPDATE FOR LIEK A MONTH! SURPRISE TWIST JUST FOR YOU_**

**_Spoiler Alert_**

What do you think about my idea with Jake and the accident? Review with all ur comments plz!


	5. Chapter 4 Discussions

That night Jake came. I tried my best to pretend I wasn't happy, but to be honest I was scared to have him there. What if he heard about my odd dream? I couldn't even come to imagine how he would take it. He would probably take it as an escalation of my madness. No, the last thing I needed was Jake freaking out over me.

The sketch was still in my jacket pocket, slightly crumpled but otherwise intact. I tried not to glance at it, but I couldn't help it. It worked like Jake, as a little sun. Although I'm not sure little is the right adjective applying to Jake… I sat with him on my bed, silent.

"Bells?" he asked. My head turned to him. "Are you okay?" I nodded.

"I have some news…" he said. I looked scared. Had he heard anything new about Victoria? Victoria was a crazed vampire that's mate Ed- he killed to save me. Thinking about it sent the familiar pangs of my holes through my body. Jake gripped me to keep me from falling over.

"I'm just in charge of a run tonight… After you fall asleep." I sighed. That wasn't that bad.

"Where are you running?" I asked, curious.

"The… entire state perimeter." I felt my jaw pop open when the words came out.

"What… Jake you can't! What if… Victoria or… you'll starve running. The whole state has to be… NO!" I sputtered. He frowned

"You just said you were fine with me running!"

"Before you said it was around the whole state! Do you know how dangerous that is! They… shoot wolves in some parts, Jake!" I was yelling now, and was mildly surprised Charlie didn't wake. I lowered my voice a little. "If you go… I… I won't let you!" Even I could tell I was bluffing. Jake chortled a little at my ridiculous attempt at a threat.

"It's safe, Bells!" he said. He patted my back.

"No Jake, it's not! Stop acting like you're invincible, Jake! You can get hurt like everyone else! WHY DO YOU ALWAYS ACT AS IF NOTHING CAN HURT YOU, JAKE!" I could tell by his wounded face my words had found a mark. I quickly racked my brain for something to say to release tension.

"I love you Bella." Jacob said. I felt my heart stop, and everything happened in slow motion. My brain was processing the words but my self was not. Finally I breathed in. Tension was lessened, that's for sure.

"Be safe Jake." I whispered.

"Do you love me?" Jake asked.

"I-I J-Jake I… I don't know." I frowned at myself.

"That's all I wanted to hear, Bells." he said. "You are in love with me, I know it. You just haven't figured it out yet. I promise I'll stay alive for you."

"That's all I want." Then he cupped his hand on my cheek and kissed me gently. I was too shocked to react. Then he jumped out the window, changing wolf as he went.

"Live Jake." I whispered. "For me."


	6. Chapter 5 The Accident

**Ch.5 The Accident**

Needless to say I did not sleep well that night. My mind was filled with worry for Jacob. I couldn't sleep. I once again found myself compelled to get up and walk in the forest before sunrise.

Standing on top of my tree, feeling the wind blow my hair, I was hit by thoughts. It felt as if all my thoughts were flying in the air around me, hitting me gently. I was contemplating a million and three things at once. Most of all was one thing stuck in my head. Fear for Jake.

I was being haunted by the wolf in my dream. Fearful that Jake would become that wolf. I fingered my drawing in my pocket. I felt almost as if the dream was a warning. Then I heard Charlie calling and I hastened to leave the comfort of my tree.

When I saw the look on Charlie's face I knew it. Something had happened to Jake. For one, he was waiting at the bottom of the tree, bizarre for him. He had a sad look on his face.

"Bella… it's Jake." As soon as the words were out of his mouth I was in my truck, booting the engine. I could hear Charlie calling, but I didn't answer. I wasn't going to listen to reason. I was going to see Jake, now.

I started the truck angrily, taking all my anger out on the steering wheel and pedals. Positive that I was going way above the speed limit, I sped in the general direction of La Push. Inside my head was screaming things. 'What if he's dying? How serious is it? Does Billy know what happened? Is Jake in a coma?' The longer I debated things, the crazier they got. Finally I pulled up in the Black's drive and ran through the door, ignoring all civility.

Jake was lying on the couch in wolf form, perfectly still. I almost cried when I saw the damage. It looked like he had been shot eight times at the least; it was hard to know because he healed so fast. Billy was sitting with him.

"Poor Jake. He saved many life's last night, you know." I looked at Billy weird.

"Some hunters were attacking them, and Jake couldn't let anyone be shot. He took almost every shot they fired. He wouldn't let one hit any of the other wolves, not even Leah." I shook my head. How could he do this?

"I'll go call Charlie, tell him you arrived." I nodded stiffly. "Thank you Bella." I turned my head to look at Billy. "He keeps talking about how he has to live. When I asked him, he said his only will to live was you. You are keeping him alive." I couldn't find the words to answer that, and when I did, Billy had left.

I spent the whole night there, with Jacob, watching as he stitched himself together. The tears stopped at about one, and I fell asleep for a few hours. The rest of the time I hummed to him, or reminded him of his promise. I didn't leave until four the next day. When I did, it was to visit my tree.

I sat at the top limb of my tree, feeling the wonderful high I always get. I was happy, until I remembered my life. More than that, I remembered Jake.

"Don't let him die," I murmured. "Please." I heard the wind whistle, daring me to try harder.

"DON'T LET HIM DIE!" I yelled. "I NEED HIM! PLEASE, SPARE HIM!" The wind grew silent, and the entire earth seemed at a standstill. The sun was just peaking.

"Please," I said, even with my voice lowered it carried for miles through the soundless forest. "He's my sun. The sun never dies. Don't let him die either." The sun set on the final note of my words, and I sat down on the limb, haunted by the bitter visions of the scarred wolf that had so soon become an even worse reality.


End file.
